Koalas? Cuddly? Huggable? Ha. HA! I'd rather hug a skunk, or something that doesnt attempt to claw my limbs apart while I try my best to hug it.
This traumatic incident in my life happened in 5th grade. I was visiting a wildlife sanctuary called Bunya Park in Queensland, Australia. We were walking around, when suddenly I noticed a smallish crowd around the hut in front of us. I rushed over to see what it was all about. Turns out, for $7 Australian, you could be given the chance to hold a Koala. Now, being the young, naive child that I was, I was excited. I had been told all about these lovable bears since I was little. Now I could HOLD one.
Bad move, miniluna!
The worst part of this is that since everyone else was too afraid (or too cheap to pay $7!) to hug a koala, they all decided photographing this little girl practically screaming in pain would be great! So everyone asked me to smile. Smile, smile, smile!
I was literally in agony. But my parents didn't understand. "You wanted to hold it, right?" my mom smiled, as she took another picture, asking me to 'grin widely'.
After the above picture was taken, the evil grey clump of more evil was pried off my writhing body, and put back on his tree clump. Bloody evil little bastards. I glared at him with as much menace as I could dare, without the fear of him leaping at me to eat my brains. He only stared back, giving me that koala stare of death. Brr.
In conclusion, koalas are:
1) Not cute!
2) Evil!
3) NOT HUGGABLE!
Thank you for your time! Tune in for next millenium's edition of... LUNADVENTURES!